


Productive Fantasy

by masochistedgelord



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: Accidental Confession, Daydreaming, Dreams vs. Reality, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Pining, Post-Reconciliation, Sexual Tension, Thirsty Saruhiko, sarumi fest 2017
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-11-28 23:17:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11428314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/masochistedgelord/pseuds/masochistedgelord
Summary: Saruhiko can't get Yata off his mind. Not that he really wants to... But it's becoming a problem.





	Productive Fantasy

**Author's Note:**

> This has actually been a wip for Saruhiko_bb for a while, I thought I may as well finish it and post it for Sarumi Fest 2017 too (^_^)  
> Slight references to LSW and one of the Sarumi Drama CD's.  
> Uh..Enjoy..?

Saruhiko was tired. Abnormally tired.

For almost all month he’d been short on sleep. Since the slates destroyal, his long work hours had doubled and occasionally getting only three hours of a light unsatisfying sleep was taking it’s toll. It wasn’t as if that was new to Saruhiko though, having been pretty much used to doing late shifts previously, staying in and fixing the mistakes on his co-workers reports. For him to suddenly be at the end of his rope was unusual.

Today he felt particularly bad. Murderously so. 

It might have something to do with the fact that when he actually managed to get the time to sleep, it took ages for his mind to shut down, if it did at all, although he could blame the extreme amount of caffeine he had consumed in the day for that. His thoughts wandered freely, spiralling into dangerous territory as his capacity to shut them up was weakened. Then of course, when Saruhiko was woken up inevitably by the blaring noise of his alarm, it felt like he hadn’t actually slept. 

_I swear if Doumyoji asks me one more question about the assignment I’ve already explained...I’m actually going to stab him._

_The Captain won’t even be able to stop me._

“Um… Fushimi-san what was it that-” 

“Doumyoji.” Saruhiko growled, cutting off the one, who he decided right then, was definitely the biggest pain in the world to any sane person. He looked up with a glare, fully ready to draw his throwing knives, only to see a very shocked looking Hidaka in front of him.  Saruhiko clicked his tongue in annoyance. 

“What.” 

Hidaka gulped and laughed nervously, waving his paper around. “E-Erm..Never...mind.” 

Saruhiko rolled his eyes and Hidaka scampered back to his desk on the other side of the room as fast as he could. Saruhiko’s head ached. He rubbed his eyes under his glasses and let his hands slide down his face. 

_Am I actually getting sick or something?_

The worrying thought was becoming more and more frequent throughout the day. He got ill quite often after all, and he hated every second of it. 

_It must be because of all these troublesome dreams. Probably. No, not probably. Definitely._

Usually, Saruhiko rarely dreamt. When he did have dreams however, they were quite vivid and mildly disturbing. Often about normal places with surreal imagery or unrealistic scenarios. He also soon forgot them moments after waking up, dismissing them as useless information to keep stored in his brain, and proceeded about his business as usual. 

Though he did retain a few memories of certain dreams he’d had. There was one painful one in particular from when he was younger that he wished he could forget like almost every other one, but it was different and he knew, would always be there in the back of his mind. Even buried under layers of lies and denial he built to try and hide it behind. Much like everything else he tried to bury from that time. 

It was the first time he had dreamt about Yata. That guy was also there. Of course he was. Yata was falling, being forcibly taken away from him while he stood helpless. It had felt like Saruhiko’s whole world was disappearing right before his eyes.

The next one Saruhiko remembered was also about Yata, sometime after he had betrayed Homra, though the memory of it was not as sharp and vivid as the first time. 

Everything and everyone was gone except for them. The world was lost once again but it was not so small this time. Even though they were the only ones left, forced together, it felt like nothing had changed between them. Like even Saruhiko’s subconscious refused to let him accept Yata would actually be by his side again with no strings attached. 

That was it for a long time. But lately….

He felt his phone buzz on the desk beside him and glanced at the screen. 

 **11:45AM-Misaki:** Saru we ok 4 lunch in an hour? 

Saruhiko’s brow softened slightly. 

_Lunch...with Misaki. Again._

Then his frown was back with a small grimace. Suddenly his head throbbed, the aching intensifying.

_Ugh. This is actually all that idiot's fault._

It wasn’t like he didn’t want to spend time with Yata. He did. He really… 

The road to rebuilding their friendship and understanding each other definitely hadn’t been easy, though it wasn’t like they had expected it to be easy either. Things between them still weren't anywhere near perfect, but they had started talking and hanging out normally a lot more, slowly but surely mending and healing the wounds they had inflicted on each other over the past few years. Things were a lot better between them than they were a few months ago. It’s just…Saruhiko still found it weird. Yata trusted him enough again to casually hang out like they used to, but now it was so different to back then. Not necessarily bad, just...strange. Saruhiko knew he was happy to see Yata. Maybe more than he felt like admitting. But…

_Does Misaki feel obligated to hang out with me a lot now or something? I’m sure he has better things to do... Better people to have lunch with._

Saruhiko’s frown deepened and his stomach twisted harshly at the thought. His insecurities bold enough to make their way into his sleep deprived mind during the day. 

The fact that Yata had constantly been appearing in his dreams almost every night, invading his brain and refusing to let Saruhiko sleep wasn’t helping any, either. Not that he minded really, he even caught himself lying down, all ready to sleep _hoping_ Yata would appear in his dreams again and again. The fact that he was free to see and do what he wanted without the fear of being rejected was magnetic. 

But Saruhiko had started feeling increasingly restrained and uncomfortably yearning for _more_ every time they actually met up and it was getting annoying. 

Especially considering they had started spending time together more often. 

Saruhiko had only just gotten lunch with Yata two days ago. He had also spent almost every free day last month playing co-op video games in Yata’s small apartment. Saruhiko even ran into him in a small café the night before while getting a light snack before returning back to Scepter 4 to finish his tasks. It had gotten colder out and a light sprinkling of snow had been falling. Saruhiko had been contemplating if he should just take the paperwork back to his dorm and finish it in bed quickly and maybe get some real sleep. 

_Yeah right…_

He remembered feeling his heart skip a beat in his chest as he caught sight of a certain slightly shorter man standing in front of him. Yata’s bright copper hair was sticking out underneath a wooly hat and he was wearing an oddly familiar green muffler, waiting to be served.

* * *

“Saruhiko!” 

Saruhiko had noticed Yata’s golden eyes light up like sparks flying from a gentle hearth fire when he caught his attention by poking him in the shoulder. 

“Yes, it’s me Misaki. You don’t have to shout.” 

Yata’s face was flushed slightly from the drastic temperature difference of the cold outside and the warmth inside of the café.

“I’m no- ahh forget it! What are you doing here?” 

Saruhiko squinted at him. “Hm. I don’t know. What do people usually do in here?” 

Yata’s eyes had widened at that. 

“S-so we just happened to run into each other?” 

“Seems like it.” 

Saruhiko smirked at him, then. 

“Did you think I was stalking you or something?” 

Yata’s flush deepened and he looked away, hiding the bottom part of his face in his muffler slightly. Saruhiko’s stomach flipped at the sight. 

“W-What! No I didn’t! That’s creepy. A-and anyway how was I supposed to know you wasn’t?! Haven’t you admitted to stalking me before?”  

Saruhiko looked away. “Huh...Did I say something like that...”  

_Someone had to keep an eye on you._

Yata huffed and moved forward with the line. He pulled his wooly hat off and ran his fingers through his hair, mussing it up. Saruhiko found his eyes fixated on the movement and the small snowflakes that had settled in between the silky looking strands.The dimmed lighting in the café made it seem like Yata’s hair was sparkling and Saruhiko silently marvelled at the sight, feeling only slightly guilty about staring while Yata’s back was turned. 

 _I wonder what it feels like…_  

Yata put his wooly hat back on and Saruhiko had to contain a sound of disapproval. 

Someone suddenly pushed into Saruhiko from behind and he stumbled forward almost falling onto Yata, only managing to catch himself just in time but the damage had been done. He was now close enough to Yata that he could feel the warmth radiating from his body, close enough to identify his scent of woody, earthiness mixed with something that Saruhiko had always associated with comfort and protection.

_How long has it been since I’ve been this close to Misaki?_

Dangerous...This was dangerous. Saruhiko’s heartbeat kicked up a notch and he could feel himself leaning closer unconsciously. Yata suddenly moved forward to collect his order and Saruhiko felt a brief emptiness wash over him. He looked away as Yata turned around. 

“Saru...” 

Saruhiko felt like he shouldn’t but he looked back at Yata anyway, catching the brightest golden eyes gazing at him. 

The intensity of actually having Yata’s eyes on only him, without the anger and hate but with a pleased softness instead like they used to have in the past, was jarring at first. Even now it was causing an unsettling feeling to run through Saruhiko’s being, making his already frantic heartbeat feel almost painful. He felt dizzy with a delight that made his fingers ache and he suddenly wanted to itch the patch of burnt skin he hadn’t touched in ages, to touch Yata’s face, but make him turn away, to fill his eyes with disgust again. Because this...this wasn’t for him. Yata shouldn’t look at him like he had always wanted. Not after everything he’d done. Yet, at the same time he felt himself desperately holding on to that soft gaze that had once left him, determined to never lose it again. To never let it be filled with anger again. 

What Yata said next with that honest, open gaze ended him. Saruhiko felt like screaming. He wanted to run away, but he also wanted to wrap his arms tightly around Yata’s form, bask in his warmth, his protection... and never let go. 

“I-It was really... n-nice to run into you.” 

* * *

Saruhiko knew he was not getting anything remotely resembling proper sleep after that. He was startled out of his thought’s by his phone buzzing on his desk again.

 **12:00PM-Misaki:** Saruhiko?

He had gotten carried away by his memories of the night before and had forgotten to text Yata back. Saruhiko clicked his tongue again for possibly the hundredth time that morning. 

_Neglecting the real Misaki for the memories of the Misaki from the café last night... What am I doing._

Saruhiko opened his text messages and began to type in vague annoyance.

 **You:** Everything is your fau| 

_Probably shouldn’t say that._

Everything is| 

Every|

 **You:** _

He bit his lip. 

_I only just saw him._

I’m busy right now.|

Right now, he wasn’t. 

_I should probably limit my interaction with him before things get out of hand and-_

Saruhiko sighed in exasperation and erased his typed out message yet again.

I’m bu| 

_Things are probably already out of hand though.._

Because still...Saruhiko wanted to see Yata again, even if it was unnecessary. 

_I don’t know dammit. How can I even face him after that… Ridiculous dream._

After seeing Yata, Saruhiko had returned back to Scepter 4 and his heart had not slowed it’s racing beat till his head finally hit his pillow. He had tossed and turned for a while before (he assumed) finally falling asleep. 

* * *

_“Saaru! Saaaaa- ruuuu! Saru! Wake up!”_

_A muffled voice was calling him from the window. It sounded suspiciously like..._

_Huh... Misaki? Misaki came to see me?_

_Saruhiko groggily sat up and instantly became aware of how warm and bright the room was, even with his blinds closed. Sticky sweat trickled down his back with the movement and he scowled sleepily._

_“Saru, get your lazy ass over here!”_

_The voice sounded louder now and Saruhiko glanced at his covered window._

_“Misaki you can’t even see my ass.” He mumbled._

_“Sh-shut up! Just get over here already.”_

_Saruhiko blinked in surprise._

_He..heard that?_

_He blanched as he moved, peeling the sheets off himself. Saruhiko’s bare feet carried him across the warm wooden flooring towards the window as he rubbed at his eyes sleepily._

_He reached up and pulled the blinds open slowly, the brightness that had been seeping through the gaps becoming even brighter as sunlight now flowed into the room freely. Saruhiko closed his eyes quickly the harsh light still too much for him, before slowly opening them again._

_The blue sky was hanging low in an almost surreal manner, cloudless and clear except..._

_Oh my god._

_Saruhiko blinked. Then blinked again to make sure he was actually seeing what he thought he was seeing._

_“Misaki what… the fuck.” He deadpanned._

_“Saru, I’m the fucking sun.”_

_The sky was clear, except of course for the giant sun which was Yata’s head glowing magnificently, right in the center._

_Yata grinned proudly as if he had possibly told Saruhiko the best thing in the world, the sky around his head glowing even brighter with the action. Saruhiko’s eyes stung as they reached their limit and were forced shut as the light seemed to encompass him._

_Saruhiko’s eyes flickered open as he woke up grudgingly, his whole body protesting as he moved to slap a hand across his forehead._

_Misaki was the sun... Ok. This has to stop._

* * *

Saruhiko didn’t even want to know what disturbing part of his subconscious _that_ had come from. 

His phone buzzed in his hand, once again reminding him of the present. Looking down he saw a new message from Yata. 

 **12:05PM-Misaki:**  Its ok we can leave it if ur busy or somethin...

Anxiety curled in Saruhiko’s gut and he felt his heart sink a little. 

_No..No Misaki I don’t want to leave it._

Saruhiko hurriedly typed and sent a reply before he could over think it. 

 **12:06PM-You:** I can’t right now but I’ll meet you for dinner? 

_What did I just do._

Yata’s reply came almost instantaneously.

 **12:06PM- Misaki:** Yeah! Dinner at my place then! Just come by when ur finished with ur blue stuff ok

_Dinner at Misaki’s... Just act normal. I can do that right…?_

Saruhiko chewed on his bottom lip, warily. Unlike when they used to physically fight, now simply being in Yata’s mere presence sent his adrenaline spiking into hyper drive with a need for...something. 

_It’s not like I want to fight him either...it’s-_

_I want..._

Yata smiling at him happily, along with words that were full of relief,   _“Let’s talk more later!”_  Flashed through his mind. 

_He’s always-_

Saruhiko suddenly became aware of loud whispering behind him. 

“I don’t know! I mean he’s just been staring straight at his screen for like the past half hour, is he okay?” Doumyoji was trying and failing to talk without being overheard by Saruhiko. 

“Why don’t you just ask him?” Fuse muttered back. 

“E-ehh?! No way.” 

“Fuse-san I didn’t think you disliked Doumyoji that much.” Enomoto was whispering too.

“You hate me?!” Doumyoji cried loudly, whispering attempts going out the window. 

_These idiots..._

“What, I don’t! Enomoto!” Fuse hissed. 

“Um..guys..” Akiyama murmured. 

Benzai cleared his throat and the others stopped talking hurriedly. 

Doumyoji turned around slowly to see an unimpressed Saruhiko staring at them.

“U-uh, are you o-okay?” Doumyoji stuttered out. 

“He really asked!” Hidaka stated in shock.

Saruhiko tsked and narrowed his eyes at them. 

“I’m fi-” 

“Fushimi-kun.” 

A collective gasp was heard in the room before falling abruptly silent as Munakata’s deep voice suddenly interrupted. 

Saruhiko turned around in his seat to face him. 

“Yes, Captain?” 

Munakata pushed his glasses up and it felt almost as if the room had gotten a little chillier. 

“I would like to talk to you privately in my office. Feel free come by when you have a moment.” 

Then just as quickly as he’d appeared, he left. 

“What...was that about.” Fuse broke the silence. 

“Who knows. That guy just likes being creepy.” Saruhiko muttered. 

Fuse frowned as Saruhiko moved to get up.

“Y-you're going there _now_?!” Doumyoji exclaimed. 

“Might as well.” 

 _

“Oya. Would you look at that.”

Saruhiko stared in horror at the first line on the report Munakata was showing him. It was his own report, one which he had just completed in fact. 

-In light of these events it should be understood that melted snowflakes look good on Misaki.

Saruhiko looked from the report to Munakata then back at the report again, willing it to be fake. 

_This is so humiliating._

Munakata was watching him with a small smile playing around the edges of his mouth. 

_This damned… He looks way too amused for his own good._

“Would you like some time off to deal with these feelings Fushimi-kun?” 

“There’s nothing to deal with!” Saruhiko snapped. 

Munakata arched an eyebrow. “I see. So you’ve already accepted them.” 

“What.” Saruhiko could not believe what he was hearing.

Munakata smiled at him widely. “It’s no good to keep things bottled up Fushimi-kun. Does Yata Misaki know of your feelings?” 

“No!” Saruhiko blurted. His head was spinning. 

Munakata rested his chin on his clasped hands and watched Saruhiko thoughtfully. “Why not?”

“I can’t just tell him! How could I possibly tell him he’s the only-” Saruhiko’s eyes widened and he stopped himself abruptly. “I-...It is really none of your business Captain.” Saruhiko grit his teeth and tried to regain some control over this dangerous conversation.

_Of course he doesn’t care whether it’s his business or not...he’ll just make it his business._

“The fact that it is interfering with your work makes it my business.” Munakata replied amicably.

_He does have a point though._

“You should not be afraid of stepping across the line and moving forward.” 

_Die._

“Nor should you be afraid of what Yatagarasu-kun will think of you. That's never stopped you before after all, has it?” Munakata’s face was now serious.

He was just trying to help in his own way Saruhiko assumed, attempting to sate his rising annoyance.

 _But still…_  

“I really hate this part of you, Captain. Who’s afraid?” Saruhiko spat. 

_I just...can’t afford to lose him over something stupid like this._

“Even so, it is my duty to ensure that my clansmen are well and of sane mind and body.” 

“We’re not your clansmen anymore…” Saruhiko muttered.

“Ah yes, it is simply ‘subordinates’ now, my apologies.” 

“And I’ve never been sane to begin with.” Saruhiko huffed.

A sudden smile made it’s way across Munakata’s face. “Of that, I am well aware.”

Saruhiko turned away, pulling a face at the fondness that was clearly noticeable in his Captain's demeanor.  

“However…” 

Saruhiko looked back at him sharply. 

“What, _Captain_?” He drawled. 

“You are doing a lot better with that. I’m sure Yatagarasu-kun has noticed as well.” 

“Noticed...what?” 

“Your hard work in rebuilding what was once lost.” 

Saruhiko frowned. “What I destroyed you mean.” 

Munakata narrowed his eyes. “We are looking towards the future. A better future that we will create ourselves, you would do well to create one too.”

“Tsk.” Saruhiko clicked his tongue rudely, feeling like a toddler being told off all of a sudden. He stared sourly at the report that was the culprit of this whole situation, wishing he could make it suddenly burst into flames on Munakata’s desk. 

“Repairing the past is fine Fushimi-kun but what happens then? History may be doomed to inevitably repeat itself.”

“..Even if you say that…” Saruhiko scoffed. 

“Are you expecting Yata-kun to stay single forever?” 

Munakata’s sudden question sounded like glass shattering in Saruhiko’s ears. 

_No..I-_

“I…” Saruhiko’s throat had gone dry and the syllable felt like ash on his tongue. 

Munakata smiled graciously at having left Saruhiko speechless. 

“You can take the rest of the day off.”

Saruhiko blinked, disbelief painting his face.

“You should prepare for your date after all.” 

Saruhiko’s mouth fell open.

“My what?!” 

Munakata's smile grew even wider. 

 _

_Stupid. The Captain is stupid. Everything is stupid. Telling Misaki how I..that kind of thing is.._

Saruhiko frowned at himself in the mirror.

_Take the day off to get ready he says. As if it would take me the rest of the day to get ready. I'm not a girl…_

Saruhiko ran his fingers through his hair again, spiking it up before deciding he liked how it looked before and messed it up again. When he was finally done with it he gave himself a final once over. He still looked tired, those bags weren't going anywhere anytime soon. He had changed into casual clothes, a simple light coloured sweater that fit his form well and black jeans that made his legs look skinnier than they actually were. 

The Captain was wrong. He wasn’t afraid of telling Yata. He was terrified. 

 _Misaki would most probably prefer some pretty dress-wearing girl by his side. If he could actually manage to even talk to one_.

The thought of his best friend stuttering and being flustered brought a small smile to his face. Even if it wasn't for him. He turned away from the mirror and glanced at the clock.

 **4:30PM**  

_It's probably too early. Misaki's probably not even home yet. He might still be at his part time job. Or Homra._

His gaze found it's way to his bed.

_Should I..? I might look a little better if I sleep._

But no dreaming.

Yeah, it probably wasn't a good idea if he dreamt about Yata just before going to see him. Especially if it was something weird he decided, taking his glasses off and putting them on his desk. The bed looked really comfortable and soon Saruhiko was walking forwards and laying on it before he could stop himself. 

 _Just a while...is fine.._ _No...dreaming…_

Saruhiko’s eyes were closing but they snapped open again when he thought he heard a noise in his room, and he looked around with a frown. A soft sigh made it’s way over to his ears and Saruhiko glanced down sharply to see Yata perched at the end of his bed as if it were the most normal thing in the world. 

“Misaki…?” 

Yata grinned at him and shifted forward so he was sitting on the bed fully. It was then Saruhiko realised Yata was dressed in only boxers and a white t-shirt. Saruhiko’s eyes widened and he sat up in a rush as Yata started crawling up the bed over to him. 

_Is this..._

Yata brought his left hand up to cup his face and Saruhiko found himself leaning ever so slightly, into Yata’s gentle touch. 

“Hey, Saru.” Yata whispered softly with his face mere inches away from Saruhiko’s own. 

“What are you-” Yata stopped him by dropping his fingers from Saruhiko’s cheek and pressing the tips of them against Saruhiko’s lips instead. 

“Shh..” 

Saruhiko sat completely still, as if even the smallest movement would cause Yata to pull away and disappear, and found himself completely entranced by Yata’s golden eyes.

Yata moved slowly, shifting back down the bed with bare legs, his bright eyes never leaving Saruhiko’s own. He stopped moving over Saruhiko’s legs, hovering just above the waistline of his jeans. He broke eye contact, looking down between his long lashes and Saruhiko felt his mouth go dry.

Yata’s hands slid across the sheets towards Saruhiko’s waist. 

“M-Misaki…” Saruhiko gasped as Yata’s fingers brushed the sensitive skin on his lower stomach, where his shirt had ridden up slightly. Yata hooked his fingers under Saruhiko’s loose belt and looked back up at him with half lidded eyes. The sultry look had Saruhiko squirming as he moved to lay on his back again, until Yata grabbed his sides firmly to keep him still.

“M-Misaki I-” 

“Y-yeah, Saruhiko?” Yata’s voice was husky and so filled with lust Saruhiko could barely stand to listen. 

He squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again in shock when he felt a sudden pressure on his stomach. Looking down he saw Yata’s copper head resting on his middle. Saruhiko swallowed around a lump in his throat a few times, trying and failing to form words.

“Misaa-ki..” He managed to rasp.

He received a hum in response. 

“I- I..”

“What is it Saru?” Yata asked lifting his head up. 

“Misaki...I…”

_What am I even trying to say?_

Yata’s fingers found themselves back at Saruhiko’s belt. 

“Y’know Saru, all you’ve said is my name…”

Yata made light work of the belt, throwing it to the floor with a dull thud once he was done. He grabbed the top of Saruhiko’s jeans and pulled them down to his knees, leaving him exposed except for the thin fabric of his briefs covering his most intimate part. Saruhiko inhaled sharply as the cool air hit his bare skin. 

“You need to tell me it’s okay.” 

Yata was looking down again as he rested his slightly calloused hands on Saruhiko’s knees.

“It’s okay.” Saruhiko whispered almost inaudibly. 

“Heh.” Yata smirked at him deviously, locking their eyes together briefly before suddenly pushing Saruhiko’s legs apart. “Ah!” 

Saruhiko felt Yata lean down and drop quick, light kisses along the inside of his right thigh. His breath hitched in his throat as Yata sucked and nibbled on the skin softly, yet just hard enough to leave a mark. Saruhiko bit his bottom lip as he felt Yata move upwards. 

“What do you want...Saru…” Yata breathed across his skin, making him shiver. 

“M-Misa... ki.” Saruhiko spoke around a soft moan. 

“Hmm? You have to tell me properly.” 

Yata sucked on the skin at the edge of Saruhiko’s briefs then proceeded to lick a line following around the seam right where skin and cloth met, instead. 

“I w-want...Misaki.” Saruhiko shuddered. “J-just Misa-ki...” 

“Good enough.” Yata sighed and moved away, admiring the mess he’d made of Saruhiko’s thighs and of the obvious arousal stretching his briefs outwards and away from his stomach. 

Saruhiko flushed and attempted to frown, about to protest the staring when a loud moan was ripped from his throat instead, as Yata suddenly leaned down and pressed an even pressured, open mouthed warm kiss on his crotch through his underwear. 

_That.. it- feels so...good..._

Saruhiko gripped the sheets at his sides tightly. 

“A-again..” He ordered breathlessly.

Yata complied, immediately repeating the action this time pressing a little harder and pulling on the material that was caught between his lips slightly. Yata let go and instead sucked on the fabric, moving up sideways towards the waistband by the hip, with Saruhiko writhing beneath his mouth all the while. Reaching the waistband Yata tugged on it harshly with his teeth before letting go, allowing the elastic to snap against Saruhiko’s skin with a satisfying noise. 

“Ha-!”

And then nothing. 

Saruhiko frowned at the sudden loss of contact and looked about to see where Yata had gotten to. 

“Saruhiko.” 

Yata was sitting back, watching him intently.

“M-Misaki, why did you stop?”

"Tell me, Saru."

"H-huh?" 

"You have to tell me properly.” 

“What-?” 

“What do you want?” 

Saruhiko’s eyes flew open to an empty room.

He sat up, body feeling like lead as he moved. He grimaced as his senses returned to him, along with an extremely uncomfortable tightness in his lower stomach.

_Of course I would have a dream like that now._

Dreams of this nature wern’t exactly uncommon, however they were rare and unexpected and they always left Saruhiko feeling unsatisfied, whether he managed to finish or not.

He clicked his tongue feeling fully annoyed and hardly well-rested like he had hoped he’d feel. Saruhiko picked his phone up to check the time, squinting at the bright light in the semi-dark room and mentally trying to wind himself down in the process.

**6:45PM**

_It definitely didn't feel like I slept this long._

**3 unread messages from Misaki.**  

Saruhiko's eyes widened at the notification blinking across his phone. 

Quickly unlocking it and going into the chat, he felt his heart twist. 

 **6:01PM- Misaki:** urstill coming right

 **6:20PM- Misaki:**  ?

 **6:33PM- Misaki:** Saru..?

_He's been waiting for me..._

Saruhiko was sure he had never brang his keyboard up and typed so fast.

 **6:47PM- You:** On my way now.

_Damn it Misaki...It's not like you gave me a time._

Saruhiko pocketed his phone and ran to the bathroom to re-smooth his sleep hair and wash his face quickly with _cold_ water, before putting his glasses on and leaving the dorm. 

_

Saruhiko shoved his hands into his jeans pockets, the chilly winter air breezing past as he stood in front of Yata's apartment door. 

_What the hell? Why am I still standing here..._

Saruhiko had been here loads of times before so why was he suddenly feeling so nervous now? 

_It's fine. It's fine he doesn't know anything._

Taking a deep breath he lifted a hand and knocked on the door hard, before shoving it back in his pocket. 

"ACk!" A loud exclamation and a crashing noise came from behind the door before being followed by the sound of footsteps getting closer, keys jangling...

Then the door was thrown open violently, a frazzled looking Yata standing in the doorway. Saruhiko blinked before running his eyes over the shorter male. 

Then wishing he hadn't. 

Yata was dressed in a black tank top and dark green shorts. Tanned skin and all the right lean muscles just, on display for Saruhiko to see. 

_Why...Is he dressed like that in this weather!?_

Saruhiko gulped as Yata laughed nervously, the muscles in his neck and jaw moving in tandem with the endearing sound. 

_I am going to die._

"S-Saruhiko...you're here!" 

Saruhiko grudgingly dragged his eyes away from Yata's neck to meet his gaze. To his surprise Yata was looking away from him with his cheeks a little flushed.

“And you l-look...uhm you’re n-not..” Yata stuttered. Saruhiko frowned.

_Is he trying to say he’s mad?_

“Am I late..?” Saruhiko asked carefully. 

Yata looked at him in confusion before looking away again. 

“Eh? No, No it’s f-fine.” 

“Ok…Were you planning to eat dinner outside, in the hallway Misaki?” Saruhiko asked as a shiver went through him.

“Ah shit! Yeah sorry.. You should uh come in. O-obviously we’re not eating out here in the cold dumbass!” Yata exclaimed reaching forward suddenly and pulling Saruhiko into his apartment by the arm. 

He was still clutching Saruhiko’s arm as he kicked the front door shut.

_He’s warm...He’s always warm._

Yata’s apartment was warm too.

_Must be how he can dress like that. Saruhiko mused._

Yata’s hand released Saruhiko’s arm and he moved away. He had barely even let go and Saruhiko was already missing the touch. He cursed himself under his breath as Yata grinned at him, all shiny and happy, before turning to walk to the kitchen. 

“Come on! I just heated it up so..”

“You didn’t put vegetables in did you?” 

“Yeah, of course I did.”

Saruhiko stopped in his tracks. He looked into the kitchen feeling a tiny bit betrayed by the one who forever brought only warmth to the ice in his soul.

“You...What?" 

“Re-lax Saru, how long have I known you now? Obviously there’s no vegetables. You wouldn’t eat it otherwise would you!?” Yata went past him, carrying a steaming pot of something to the small table which had a sofa behind it and a television in front of it. It was Yata’s sort of living room where they usually spent all their time. 

“I’d eat it if you made it…” Saruhiko mumbled. 

“H-huh..?” 

“Tsk, Nothing.”

Saruhiko sat down on the sofa as Yata went back to the kitchen to get plates.

_So far so good._

Yata came back and decided to ruin things by sitting right next to him, close enough that their knees were touching. Saruhiko grit his teeth and found himself staring at Yata’s strong sun-kissed shoulders as he put food out in their plates.

_And why does he have to sit so close…_

“Y-You know Saruhiko…”

Yata had stopped what he was doing and was now fidgeting next to him. The way his tank top moved about his person, highlighting his toned stomach was really distracting. 

“Hm?” 

To make matters worse all Saruhiko could think about now was that damn dream he just had. Yata’s strong hands at his waist.. Pinning him down...His mouth-

_Stop._

“I’ve been thinking..”

“That’s dangerous.” Saruhiko murmured.

Yata looked at him in frustrated annoyance and Saruhiko instantly regretted his entire existence. 

“Sh-shut up! It..It’s important!” 

“I’m sorry.” Saruhiko wasn’t really listening.

_Misaki has really nice collarbones...I’ve never seen them this close before._

“You’re...EH!?” 

Saruhiko once again forced his eyes to meet Yata’s.

He frowned. “Misaki why is your face red?” 

“Y-you said sorry..”

Saruhiko blinked at him. “And..?” 

A sly smile spread across Yata’s face and oh god it was doing some strange things to Saruhiko’s chest. 

“You’ve never said sorry for being a jerk before.” 

_Oh._

Saruhiko’s mouth dropped open slightly and he didn’t miss the way Yata’s eyes flicked down to catch the movement quickly.

“Misaki, I do have feelings you know.” Saruhiko suddenly blurted.

_Bad idea. Bad idea._

Yata was staring at him.

He coughed. “I m-mean I’m not completely mean and heartless.” He finished with a tongue click for good measure.

Surprise danced across Yata’s face. 

“Sometimes.” Saruhiko added gruffly.

“Saruhiko...” 

“W-what.”

Yata turned to face him on the sofa properly and the sudden intense look he was being given was making Saruhiko feel dizzy again.

“I know that already.” 

Saruhiko actually felt his heart travel into his throat. 

“Misaki...” He said breathlessly. 

“Saru I wanted to s-see you...again, because I..” Yata was fidgeting again.

_He’s trying to tell me something._

Suddenly Munakata’s words from earlier replayed in his mind.

_“Are you expecting Yata-kun to stay single forever?”_

Saruhiko felt his stomach drop and churn. 

_If he’s telling me he found someone-_

Saruhiko realised then and there that he wouldn’t be able to hear it. He would never be able to handle that. 

“I need to...You’re always…” Yata was struggling with his words it seemed, and waiting was making Saruhiko want to rip his hair out.

“Earlier I wanted to say you l-looked n-nice!” Yata suddenly yelled. 

Saruhiko stared at him. 

_That’s...it..? Misaki thought I looked nice...I-_

Saruhiko felt his face warming up and he cursed himself under his breath again. 

“Well I know you hate the blue uniform so-” He mumbled. 

“I don’t!” Yata blurted before slamming a hand over his mouth. 

“Ah..I- uh I mean it’s fine if you w-wear it. I don’t mind..”

_Huh._

“Misaki?” 

_This...seems unlikely..._

“What?” Yata replied defensively. 

_I should test it._

“So even a virgin like you has a uniform kink. Interesting...” Saruhiko smirked at him.

Right on cue Yata exploded into a hiss with a bright red blush on his face. Saruhiko braced himself for a yell or maybe a whack but instead..

“I have a-!? Saru, you pervert..I.. don’t. It only looks ok on you. O-only on y-you.” Yata trailed off and went quiet, as he stared at Saruhiko, blush still decorating his face.  

 _What’s with that reaction Misaki_.

Yata sounded exasperated. Saruhiko _felt_ exasperated. The air between them seemed charged with anticipation, almost like before they would start a fight. 

“There’s no way..” Saruhiko whispered. 

Yata dropped his gaze to Saruhiko’s mouth for a split second before looking back up as he swallowed. Saruhiko watched his every movement feeling an ache of need and want crawling through his body, making his fingers tingle.

_If this is...if it’s just.._

Yata smiled at him weakly.

_A dream_

Before looking at his plate.

_I can.._

He looked back at Saruhiko. 

_I can maybe.. What I…Always-_

Saruhiko moved forward slightly, leaning closer to Yata. His heart was running some kind of a marathon in his chest. 

“Misaki. Look only at me.” 

“I-idiot.” Yata sighed fondly.“I am looki-mhmf!”

Saruhiko lifted his hands up and took Yata’s face in them before closing the gap between them quickly, cutting Yata off suddenly by pressing his mouth against the slightly parted lips. 

Saruhiko felt electricity emanate from their connection and spark through him, bouncing off every corner of his soul and he decided he didn’t care that it was a dream, he didn’t care. This was as close as he was ever going to get. Yata was frozen still against him, and a small sliver of doubt and nervousness ran down Saruhiko’s spine.

Until Yata suddenly pressed back against him into the kiss after just a moment. Saruhiko felt Yata’s hands move, reaching up and sliding over his own. Saruhiko moved back slowly, reluctantly releasing Yata from his hold. He drank in the scene, memorising it, making sure he would never forget it when he unfortunately woke up. Yata’s eyes were still half closed, mouth still slightly open and a faint pink blush still lingered on his cheeks and nose.

_I want...to tell him. Here I can. Tell him.._

“I love you, Misaki.” Saruhiko exhaled shakily. “I love y-ou.” 

Yata’s eyes opened, fully widening at the sound of Saruhiko’s voice. 

“Sa..Saruhiko...” Yata murmured before he moved forward suddenly, pushing Saruhiko down on the sofa with his well cultivated strength, making him yelp as he slammed his mouth down. 

Saruhiko gasped as Yata ran his tongue along his bottom lip and Yata took the opportunity to claim his mouth completely, sliding his tongue against Saruhiko’s own. Saruhiko’s hands flew up to grasp Yata’s hair and he groaned into their kiss at how soft it was, how soft he knew it would be. 

Yata pressed down against him, and Saruhiko pressed upwards, their bodies covering each other’s delightfully, static radiating off each spot of contact. Yata slid his fingers into dark hair, fingertips brushing through Saruhiko’s scalp, both clutching at each other tightly as if they would never be able to get their fill of the other and suddenly it was too much. Too intense. Saruhiko’s hand slipped from Yata’s hair and he pushed on his shoulder gently.

 _I can’t…_ Saruhiko’s brain was short circuiting on the sensory overload. They broke apart gasping for breath, having been too lost in the other to remember they had to breathe. 

Yata looked down and gulped as he took in Saruhiko’s flushed face with his glasses askew and swollen lips. Saruhiko looked up in a daze at Yata above him, panting with red lips and a determined face.  

“Sa-hah Saruhiko… I love you..so..much..so much..” Yata rasped to the man beneath him. Saruhiko’s face twisted and he let out a choked sound that had Yata’s eyes filling up slightly. He leaned down and pressed his forehead against Saruhiko’s.

Saruhiko squeezed his eyes shut and whispered, “If only that were true Misaki. I screwed things up too much. I know I’m a complete asshole and I don’t deser- I wish I could… repay you for everything you’ve done for me but that’s not possible. I only want you. Only ever...you, but I don’t know _how_.” 

That was a little too open. A little too honest but Saruhiko allowed himself, because it was just a dream. Just...a dream. Yata bit his lip as they both locked glossy gazes.

“Saruhiko…” 

“If only this wasn’t a dream.”

Saruhiko’s eyes widened the same time Yata’s did as they spoke the same line. Yata opened his mouth in shock and he scrambled back, jumping away from Saruhiko as if he’d been stung. Saruhiko attempted to do the same, and fell off the edge of the sofa in the process.

Yata drew his knees up to his chest as he caught his breath. Saruhiko grunted as he hit the ground. 

_This is not...a dream?_

Yata looked around nervously for his dark haired...friend. "U-um...Saru?" 

The sound of a tongue click floated up from somewhere on the floor. Yata peered over the edge of the sofa. "Saruhiko! What are you-" 

Saruhiko was lying on the floor flat on his back, glasses half hanging off his nose, face flushed with his chest rising and falling as he panted slightly, a mildly shocked look spread across his face. 

"Pfffftd~" Yata covered his mouth quickly as a short laugh escaped him.

Saruhiko frowned as he sat up warily.

"What's so funny Misaki?" He grumbled.

"I..haha, I'm sor hahaha sorry it's just-" Yata looked away trying to muffle his laughter. 

"Tch." 

At Saruhiko's sound of disapproval Yata finally calmed himself, taking deep breaths and looked back. Saruhiko frowned as Yata faced him. It was obvious he was trying really hard to keep a straight face. 

"It's just that..you..looked so..shocked..I-" A sudden smile started uncontrollably spreading across Yata's face as he spoke and Saruhiko found himself staring again despite everything.

 _Wait...what is even going on here_ _._

"It's... really not that funny." Saruhiko felt light-headed.

"Y-Yeah I know heheh...Sorry." Yata said sheepishly."Are you okay? You...fell..off..." And it was clear that Yata wanted to laugh. Again. 

_Stop it...That's not even the issue here!_

"I'm...fine." Saruhiko moved to get up.

"Sure.." Yata stopped Saruhiko by leaning down a little and offering his hand.Saruhiko stared at the offered hand as if it was offending him somehow before finally deciding to take it and allow Yata to pull him up. The second his skin made contact with Yata’s they both flinched feeling an electric shock. Saruhiko was ready to let go but Yata grasped his hand firmly and pulled him up before he could move away. Yata's hand in his really was warm...and strong.

_Stop.. stop I don't even.._

He let his hand slide out of Yata's grip and looked away clearing his throat. An awkward silence fell in the small room and Saruhiko felt hyper aware of everything that had just taken place.

_I can't believe we- I just-I... said all of that._

"S-so, um.." Yata's voice sounded shaky."We...u-uh.." He rubbed at the back of his neck nervously.

Saruhiko opened his mouth to say something before stopping himself realising he had no idea what to actually say.

_Misaki please...say something already._

"W-we.." Yata tried again.

"We both.." Saruhiko muttered, trying to help Yata, help them both in this situation.

"Haha, u-uh..Y-you dream about m-me huh?" Yata managed looking away with a renewed red blush.

"That should be my line Misaki." Saruhiko felt out of breath again all of a sudden.

Yata stood up from the sofa."Y-yeah I do ok! I do! I always...You damned Saru you're always messing with me! You're always in my head! I can't help it!" His voice rose defensively as he glared at Saruhiko.

Saruhiko felt his anxiety subsiding.

_This is better. This is normal. I can deal with this Misaki._

"Me..too. About Misaki..I always..dream..or something." He mumbled back. 

Yata inhaled sharply. "S-so..we thought we were h-having..the same dream." 

Saruhiko clicked his tongue. "Obviously." _Actually now that I think about it..._ "We've had the same dream once before I think."

"H-huh? We have?" Yata asked with wide eyes.

Saruhiko pushed his glasses up. "You tried to make me eat an _apple_." 

Yata's mouth made an 'O' and he stepped back, reeling slightly. "H-heh I remember that.. Yata smiled with some kind of odd look before looking serious again. "I um, S-Saru what I said- What y-you-" 

Saruhiko felt regret and nervousness prickle at the back of his neck.

"Forget it..all of it. I never heard it. It never happened.” Saruhiko said abruptly with a blank face.

_Let's just go back to how we were. I don't want to lose you Misaki.._

"W-what..?" Hurt and uncertainty decorated Yata's face and Saruhiko wanted to take it back. 

"I-It's fine Misaki. It's fine like this, you don't have to-" Saruhiko tried to fix his statement awkwardly.

"Wha- what the FUCK, Saru?!" Yata exploded."Are you telling me you don't care about what I said!?" 

"N-no-"

"That you didn’t mean what you said?!” 

“No!” 

_I was wrong, this is a dream._

Yata let out a growl and pulled at his hair in frustration.

_A crazy,_

“Why do you always- Stop trying to run away Saruhiko!” 

“I’m not really running…”

_Messed up_

“Agh! You stupid… I know that! I meant...Ugh! I’m not..dammit I’m not good with words!” 

“W-well neither am I!” Saruhiko shot back.

 _Dream_.

“Actions!” Yata suddenly declared turning to Saruhiko.“I’ll make you understand.” Yata stated, walking over to him.

“There’s nothing to understand. We were foolish and we made a mistake.” Saruhiko said quietly. 

Yata stopped in tracks looking outraged. “You fucking..” 

He grabbed Saruhiko’s sweater. “This time, I’m not going to _let_ you run.” Yata spat with determination and pulled down a little roughly, only hesitating for a split second before gently pressing his lips against Saruhiko’s. 

The kiss was delicate, tinged a with soft affection yet a searing, almost painful heat that was so _Yata_ Saruhiko’s mind went blank, his knees weakening under him. Yata pulled him closer and held him tightly.Saruhiko clutched back at him with trembling fingers, willing Yata to never let go. They reluctantly separated once again and dazed bright blue met blazing Amber.

“I fucking said I _love_ you, you dumb jerk.” Yata whispered softly.

Saruhiko shut his eyes, emotions raging through his soul threatening to escape from them as he let his head fall down onto Yata's shoulder heavily. Yata chuckled breathlessly and Saruhiko felt it resonate through him.

"I don't want to wake up." He mumbled.

"Idiot. I'm right here.You're not dreaming anymore." Yata replied fondly, closing his eyes and resting his head against Saruhiko's.

**Author's Note:**

> I have never written any kind of smut before so I apologise if it didn't read well :O  
> I hope it was fluffy enough lol  
> 


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